Category Archives: Fathers
It is always a joy to share a great book, and today I have the pleasure of introducing author R. Glenn Kelly and his book, “Sometimes I Cry in the Shower”. It is a story of a journey I promise you won’t soon forget. It is well written, informative, engaging, honest, and laced with tears, love, and laughter. Read some of the reviews here.
On to the interview…
Q: Give a little background of why you wrote your book.
A: After the tragic loss of my son Jonathan I refused to grieve, convinced that holding it back from others, and ultimately myself would allow me to survive the dark pain. However, the corrosive emotions enwrapped within grief soon began to take their toll emotionally until one morning the very spirit of Jonathan came to me in the shower. He wanted me to understand that I was not honoring him by living a life that carried on the legacy he left for me…to live, serve others and above all else, love unconditionally, something foreign to me before that hero came into my life for his short sixteen years. “Sometimes I Cry In The Shower” is my way of serving by targeting hope and healing towards men, who have so little in published materials targeted specifically at us.
Q: What direction do you want to take with your book?
A: Guided by the spirit of Jonathan, the book seems to be finding the path only he and I could hope for…serving grieving fathers. While I am using chapters and topics within the book to present at grief workshops and other venues, I am the most honored that an internationally renowned hospital specializing in pediatric cardiology has selected the book to be one item within their “Grief Basket”, which is delivered to parents six months after they have lost a child. If my publication continues down this path, it will serve the goal my late son and I have hoped for.
Q: Do you have any plans for more books in the future?
A: Yes. I am currently writing “Legacies I Left behind.” This book will be written from what I know and feel to be Jonathan’s perspective on how I should continue on with my life as a father recovering from grief. From the moments I held my son and experienced his last breath along with him, I felt an odd inner peace that would soon be overcome by the chaos and heartache that certainly came with the horrendous loss of my only child. Yet for a brief moment I felt as if the true Jon, his sprit, touched me and said “The journey begins now, Dad. I am right here and I love you.”
Q: What is the one thing that drives you more than anything else as an author?
A: Even after Jon came to me in the shower and told me to grieve, I had an inherent knowledge I would not seek professional help. I hope any man who goes through the unfortunate loss of a child or loved one will, it was certainly not in my manner to do so. I tried turning to publications meant for men who grieve and found almost nothing. Sometimes I Cry, and the following books are my way of taking the clinical research, as well as life experiences of myself and other typical males, and using them to serve others who may be sadly beginning the journey I am now on. Sometimes it takes the admonishments of a child’s spirit and legacies, and other times it takes a hand that silently reaches out to say “it is going to be okay”.
Q: What advice would you give to new authors, or those considering becoming one?
A: Do it. Write it. Regardless of the topic, fiction or non-fiction, let it out to the world if you feel it. One of my favorite, heartfelt quotes comes from Dr. Wayne Dyer who said, “Don’t die with your music still inside”.
Q: If you could share a particular message with your readers, what would it be?
A: We are all humans and we all feel emotions. Emotions are as much a part of our systemic needs as breathing air and drinking water. Those emotions flow through us like a river that must flow out to the ocean. Men have a tendency to dam up that river, usually at the heart, where we feel we might expose ourselves as weak and unmanly. This already causes the waters to flood backwards a bit and destroy a small amount of our natural flora and fauna. We might function well through normal life that way, but when the enormous emotions of grief from a loss flow towards the dam, the waters build and build, flooding out and destroying so much of who we are subconsciously, where our morality and self-worth reside. And when the dam finally breaks, and it will, those flood waters will burst forward and destroy so much life and love on the other side. Relationships, careers, friends and so much more. It has to be let out…It must be recognized and controlled! Do not continue to make the dam stronger when the grief comes. It cannot be held back forever.
Q: Any additional comments?
A: I have been absolutely humbled by the response and review of women who have read “Sometimes I Cry In The Shower”. While I initially intended the publications to be for men, I am finding female readers who say they too are finding hope and healing throughout the book. I could ask for no greater gift than to know all can use my discoveries to journey towards wholeness and healing. We will never be completely healed from the loss of a loved one, and personally there are parts of me I do not want healed. My son was woven into the very fabric of my life and to this day I have dark corners where I want to escape to, roll up in a fetal position and make the world just go away, if only for a short time. Yet, actively walking towards wholeness and healing soon brings the realization that those dark corners are getting fewer and farther apart.
Sometimes I Cry in the Shower is available on Amazon here .
About the author:
R. Glenn Kelly, grieving and healing father of Jonathan Taylor Kelly, has written professionally throughout his adult life. He has composed many informative articles published within trade periodicals in various industries and authored numerous award-winning responses to federal government solicitations in the defense industry, as well. With graphic arts as another passion, R. Glenn has also designed attractive print media ads and marketing materials for numerous companies along the way. An avid public speaker, he is just as much at home talking to an audience as he is conversing with friends over dinner.
To find out more, or to contact R. Glenn directly, please visit grievingmen.com, where you are invited to share or join in discussions related to the journey of all men who have suffered loss. R. Glenn is available for speaking engagements or grief workshop participation.
Contact R. Glenn Kelly at:
Facebook – www.facebook.com/RGlennKelly/
Twitter – @RGlennKelly
**Mr. Kelly, thank you so much for taking the time to do this interview with me! I wish you much success and joy in this and future endeavors. May God richly bless you always. – Amber
“It takes a warrior’s heart to persevere in the publishing world. Walk in the confidence that God has put a story in your heart and He will equip you to tell it. After all, it’s really His Story, isn’t it?” – Pamela Thorson, author of “Song in the Night” and “Out from the Shadows: 31 Devotions for the Weary Caregiver“.
Writers are often said to be introverts, and that may be true for many. But they are also a brave sort of people, for it takes a tremendous amount of courage to put pen to paper and share dreams, thoughts and ideas with the world. There are often ideas created out of seeing a perspective or need that needs to be addressed. Perhaps the courage comes from an overwhelming need to share a personal message, maybe an experience that might benefit others.
Such is the case for a grieving father, who after losing his only son, Jonathan, began a journey into self-discovery and healing. In his search for guidance and self-help, he found that there was not much available on the topic of men’s grief. Through his own grief, he made a connection that was the beginning of his healing. This connection has taken on a mission of its own in the form of a legacy to his son.
Having a writer’s heart, he decided that it was time to share what he discovered for himself. His name is R. Glenn Kelly, and his book, “Sometimes I Cry in the Shower” is on the fast track to making a nationwide impact on the hearts of many, men and women alike.
I commend Mr. Kelly in his endeavor to share his raw, open honesty with others into a journey that no one wants to take. And I know his son would be very proud of him. I highly recommend “Sometimes I Cry in the Shower”.
For more info on R. Glenn Kelly, visit his Author page on Amazon.
Check back soon to read my upcoming interview with R. Glenn Kelly!
God bless! – Amber
A few months before I was born, my dad met a stranger who was new to our small Tennessee town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer, and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around to welcome me into the world a few months later.
As I grew up I never questioned his place in our family. Mom taught me to love the Word of God. Dad taught me to obey it. But the stranger was our storyteller. He could weave the most fascinating tales. Adventures, mysteries and comedies were daily conversations. He could hold our whole family spellbound for hours each evening. He was like a friend to the whole family. He took Dad, Bill and me to our first major league baseball game. He was always encouraging us to see the movies and he even made arrangements to introduce us to several movie stars.
The stranger was an incessant talker. Dad didn’t seem to mind, but sometimes Mom would quietly get up – while the rest of us were enthralled with one of his stories of faraway places – and go to her room read her Bible and pray. I wonder now if she ever prayed that the stranger would leave.
You see, my dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions. But this stranger never felt an obligation to honor them. Profanity, for example, was not allowed in our house – not from us, from our friends, or adults. Our longtime visitor, however, used occasional four-letter words that burned my ears and made Dad squirm. To my knowledge the stranger was never confronted.
My dad was a teetotaler who didn’t permit alcohol in his home – not even for cooking. But the stranger felt he needed exposure and enlightened us to other ways of life. He offered us beer and other alcoholic beverages often. He made cigarettes look tasty, cigars manly, and pipes distinguished. He talked freely (too much too freely) about sex. His comments were sometimes blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing. I know now that my early concepts of the man/woman relationship were influenced by the stranger.
As I look back, I believe it was the grace of God that the stranger did not influence us more. Time after time he opposed the values of my parents. Yet he was seldom rebuked and never asked to leave.
More than thirty years have passed since the stranger moved in with the young family on Morningside Drive. But if I were to walk into my parents’ den today, you would still see him sitting over in a corner, waiting for someone to listen to him talk and watch him draw his pictures.
His name? We always called him “TV”.
He has a sister now. Her name is “computer”.
(Author Unknown, but seems to have appeared in circulation on the internet around 2007)
Just something to think about: What we allow to enter our minds also enters our hearts. And from our hearts, our life flows. What’s flowing from you?
What does it mean to be a real man and a good father?
Young boys usually learn the most from what they see and hear from their fathers. It’s natural for them to want to imitate their dad. Then they begin to learn more from the world view. There are only a few relatively short years a father has to help guide his son into becoming a grown man. Fathers, teach your sons. The role model you are is based on what is in your own heart, and is the blue print that will shape the man your son becomes. Do you want him to follow God, or the world? There is no other choice.
Do you want to teach your son to be dishonest? Let him hear you lie.
Do you want to teach your son to be rude? Let him see you treat others harshly.
Do you want to teach your son to be lazy? Let him see you get others to take care of your messes.
Do you want to teach your son to be undependable? Let him see you change your mind frequently, and not keep your promises.
Do you want to teach your son to be disobedient and defiant? Don’t follow the rules when you don’t feel like it.
Do you want to teach your son to be honest and fair? Then show him how, be honest and fair, be a man of integrity. (1 Kings 9:4)
Do you want to teach your son to be helpful and kind? Then show him how, be a humble man of compassion. (Philippians 2:3)
Do you want to teach your son to be responsible and productive? Show him how, do your own work and help others too. (Isaiah 65:21-23)
Do you want your son to be dependable and trustworthy? Show him how, be a man of good character and be consistent. (Matthew 24:44-46)
Do you want to teach your son to follow Jesus? Then show him how, walk with Christ and your son will follow. (Luke 9:23)
Do you want to teach your son to be a real man? TEACH HIM HOW TO BE LIKE JESUS!
“…but as for me and my house, we shall serve the Lord”. (Joshua 24:15)
Tags: a real man, be a real man, being an example, bible, children, Christian life, dads, Fathers, following Jesus, godly character, honor and integrity, Jesus, leading, love, sons, teaching, training, truth, walk with Christ, Wisdom